kaiser, i used to love you

but thou hast forsaken me.

okay, a bit dramatic. but i'm annoyed. they cancelled the bean's coverage and never even bothered to let me know. when she was born, they said she had to have her own plan, because she doesn't need dental coverage, and they couldn't just add her on to our current account. what the hell kind of stupidery is that?

so when we started getting bills, i called member services to see if i could just send one payment for both plans. yes, i'm lazy like that. hell, i don't even write checks - i pay online. heh. anyway, i was assured that it would be no problem, as long as i referenced both account numbers on the payments. cool.

a few months go by, i'm making the payments, all is well. february comes, we take the bean for her 4-month checkup, great. and then it's almost april, and i realize that we haven't received an appointment card for her 6-month visit.

so i call and get immediately transferred to member services. and i'm told that her account's been cancelled for non-payment. what the fuck? AND it'd been cancelled back in january. but when we went in february, no one said a damn word.

well, it turns out that they'd been crediting our account with all the payments i'd been sending in. and stupid me, i'm so oblivious, i didn't even realize that we'd not been getting billed for coverage for the last month or so. duh - we had a credit balance! but what annoyed me was that they never bothered to send us any notices of late payments, or even a notice of impending termination. my little friend monica in member services confirmed this when she looked at the outgoing mail screen on her trusty computer.

but of course, i couldn't get it resolved over the phone. oh, no, i had to fax in a letter to have the account reviewed and reinstated. so fucking stupid. and in the meantime, the bean's livin' on the edge, with no medical insurance coverage. great.

so today, almost a week after i faxed in that letter (with no response whatsoever), i called again and this time, i got shit done. she's covered again and all i have to do is send in a payment that would make a sizable dent in the national deficit.

yay! i'm so calling in with poop issues, questions about giving her water, what kind of cereal to start with. might as well take advantage of health insurance in ways aside from actual medical treatment or hospitalization, since [knocking on wood] the bean is quite healthy.