the first of the "lasts"

ah, my mollydog.

she has good days and bad days, and we've been taking her every other day for what we call her "doggy dialysis."  i really thought that she was doing pretty well, that the meds and the fluids and prescription food were helping because she seemed extra chipper.

but then yesterday she seemed to take a downward turn.  we took her for a grooming session and a haircut (we hadn't had her hair cut since july and it was getting pretty long and ratty), had a dose of fluids and then she spent the rest of the day on the couch.  she didn't want to do anything but lay there, sleep and accept our pets and hugs and love.  and when she weighed in at the doctor's office, they reported that she'd lost about 4 ounces over the last week.

i don't know how long she's going to be able to hang on, but what i'm pretty sure of is this:  this will most likely be the last valentine's day we get with her.  the "last"s are going to start piling up on us, and now all i can do is just hope that she isn't in any pain, that she isn't suffering, that she's just living out the rest of her days resting and basking in the love we've been heaping upon her in spades since hearing the terrible news.  i feel a lot of guilt for taking her for granted for so long, and i spend a lot of time just stroking her head and telling her how much we love her.  she seems to understand and reciprocate, because she's also been extra affectionate with us.  it's almost like she knows that her days are winding down and we all just have to soak in all of the time we have left together.

damn.  sorry to be such a debbie downer.  let's turn this around for a second - look at how cute she is, all clean and trimmed and dressed up for the holiday:

oh, yeah, whoops - she's not really winking at you there.  unfortunately, she managed to pick up some sort of eye infection that we're treating with some prescription drops that she hates.  boo.

uh...happy valentine's day?  yeah!  that.